Wednesday, July 23, 2008

my ass feels like i'm gonna die

make that my ass and back and shoulders.

On Monday, I did a wee bit too much of teh exercise.
Today I took a nap.

Earlier today I felt like quitting graduate school. Not only am I completely disillusioned with Academia, but I also feel that I lack the enthusiasm I once had for my subject. Now, there is a possibility that this disregard for my work stems from my overall state of being sleep deprived and sore. While there exists an equal likelihood that my spiritless state has arisen from the purgatory known as My Graduate Program.

I fantasize about being a stay at home mom. I daydream of having four kids. (In reality, I know we will probably end up with 2.)

Postsecret from Sunday:

I am weary of this stage of my life.

2 comments:

kamakula said...

Hey. I've been here. And so has my best friend Nate. In fact, I have a thesis that we (and perhaps this includes you) thrive on stress. When we're busy, working hard, we are able to maintain a level of energy and industry that normal people only do for the first four hours of the work day. However, when we stop and take a break, we start to crash.

If the break lasts too long, we crash hard and start to develop these feelings of being overwhelmed. That's because while we thrive on it, stress is bad for our minds and bodies.

Look at it this way. There is nothing new about your program or work. You've known the same (good and bad) things about it for the past week, month, year, etc. Some time ago, you had the drive and enthusiasm to stick with it. So, I think it's safe to ignore this feeling as a minor abberation.

Get some rest though :)

Fermi said...

Thanks for the words of encouragement, kamakula.

I just finished my presentation for group meeting. There is a trend I think:

Do Experiments and be happy.

Make group meeting presentations or attend group meeting and think about quitting.