Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Where am I? Where have I been?

Hey guys. Remember me? Well, I'm back from tour. I've been back for a while actually, but the culmination of a number of stressful situations made me reluctant to post. Things are sorting themselves out now, so I'm attempting to make a comeback.

I flew to Houston this past weekend with the band to play a one-off show at Rice University. It was nice to be in Texas for a few days. God the trees are beautiful in the south. While we were there, I had a conversation with one of my band mates about the constant traveling. I said, "I'm noticing that I always feel really lonely the first day or two that I'm away. And when I get back, I feel really sad for about the same amount of time." It's hard being away from the people that you love, but it can be hard coming back to them as well. I wonder if I just like consistency, or if it's that I need constant emotional support. Or maybe it just comes down to what is it that makes me happy? Last night, I posed this question to my girlfriend. "What makes you happy? Like, in general. In life." She took a few seconds, and then said, "Well, I was pretty much depressed the first 23 years of my life. Then, at 23 it all changed. I just decided that I was going to be entertained by everything." "So now you're entertained by everything, and that's what makes you happy?" "Yeah, pretty much," she said. Not bad. Such a self-sufficient recipe for happiness seems pretty appealing to me. I know that I'm definitely the happiest when I'm creating something. Playing music, making stuff, blah blah etc. etc.... But I also need someone that I can share all of that with. But wait, I have both of those things. Maybe I need them both, at once, forever.

We are playing a show in Brooklyn tonight and I am really excited. It will be our first show in the area since I joined the band. My friends and girlfriend are finally going to get to see us, and I'm totally psyched about that.

No comments: