My kids wrote a descriptive essay describing their bedrooms. It was interesting--after I finished reading them all, I thought about how most teenagers have a little kind of cool haven where they hunker down to live out the droning lonely complicated time that is high school. It's also a place where you shamelessly put all of your identity onto your wall--or the identity you either think you should have or that you want.
The kids all called this room "theirs" and "the only place I own in the house" even though that's a straight up lie because they're all 14 and jobless. But it's like they need a little safe space to curl up because they're not quite ready to not be a kid and it's like their rooms are outside reality.
It made me think of a few things.
1. When I was a teen, I didn't spend time in my room except to sleep, and I shared it with my sister. I tried putting things up on the walls and on a shelf, but it never looked all that great and it never felt like the stuff reflected my personality very well. I carry these same Feng Shui insecurities into adulthood. Also, I was envious of people with cool rooms--I can remember one friend in middle school just had a shitty little room with a daybed, an old dresser, and two desks, but her room felt like her--a whirlwind of life, busyness, and cool people. And boys. And then there were the people with the artsy rooms. I still envy them. But I do have a nice yellow living room, at least.
2. I'm curious about other couples who live together. What happens when you go from having two rooms to one? My boyfriend and I now share a room that's pretty much a bed, night tables, bookshelf, and a dresser (with paint and pictures). But I have all my clothes in the guest bedroom because I get dressed early in the morning, and he's got his computer and music stuff in this room thing that we call "the office." So we still have our own spaces, in a way. What do other people do?
3. Does this my-room-as-my-little-haven thing go away as we get older? Do we start to deal with life in a way that we don't need to curl up with our band posters and YA series praying that we're not boring but we're not the only ones like us? Maybe homes start becoming more like places to relax than hide or escape.
I still like band posters and YA series, though.