This entry is in response to Tino’s “Sugar and Spice.”
I’ll start with Power. Currently we live in a white male dominated society. Old white men hold the power in (for example) the Academy: currently they run almost every department. Old white men are usually more sexist than the majority of the population, and I have a general dislike for their lack of emotional enlightenment. If I could get away with never speaking to one of these gentlemen again, I would. But that is not the case. I have to learn to deal with them until that generation dies off. These guys do have the power, but I want nothing to do with them because I have judged them to be underdeveloped. I don’t give a shit if they think I am attractive or not, and I would rather if they kept that opinion to themselves anyway.
Summary: Old white dudes have power. I hate them.
But what about guys in my age group? As a whole, I have been generally unimpressed with them as well. Most of them fail in one or more of these categories: intelligence, self-awareness, balance, kindness, self-discipline, integrity, social skills, compassion, and self-motivation. So what do I think when I see the pretty but otherwise uninteresting blond falling all over some guy? I think: Those are two hormonal kids.
Am I scraping for power from these guys that are less developed than me? Hells No! I have way more power than them to begin with. They might be able to bench press more than me, or run faster, but that doesn’t matter right now. These are not the cave man days where we have to hunt buffalo on foot, and we have to rely on men because they can run fast. These are the times where education will let you get ahead, that and being smart, socially smart, politically smart, etc. I was told yesterday that most men are intimidated by a woman with a PhD. And to that I say: That’s because those guys don’t have their act together.
Do I feel like I am in competition with other women? No. Because if a guy can’t see that I am the most incredibly awesome person in the world, then he does not have his shit together, I guarantee you. It takes an enlightened person to recognize one.
Under “Competition with other women” you will find: fashion rules, how-to-act rules, etc. And I say: Fuck Your Rules. I make my own.
And Tino, I am sorry that you find it difficult to function in female relationships. I don’t know the whole story here, but I bet that those difficult female relationships were with some chicks who didn’t have their shit together.
Catty Chicks = Unenlightened idiots.
And girls that are only friends with guys have other issues all together.
2 comments:
The fact that the society is ultimately run by those white men you hate (hehe) is the reason why so many of us will struggle at one point or another with getting the jobs and pay we want, getting published the way we want to be published, and just generally being backed by the society the way we need to. Can our own self-worth be in tact? Sure--I hope so. Real happiness comes from within. But there are those social issues that can't be ignored, and I think just because the old white man generation will die out, that doesn't necessarily mean that everyone is going to be ready to accept other leaders in their place. I do see hope--these elections, for example. But I see the same old biases everywhere still and there's still a lot that needs to evolve.
true true true.
Hillary is getting a taste of power through her husband. But I guess what I was trying to say is that it is getting better with younger men who have had feminist mothers. I don't think all small interpersonal cattyness is about power from men. I think it is different. It has more to do with the social/emotional development of the parties involved.
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